Before I said to my husband that I don’t care what they will be editing… it is English, it’s not my native language, and they can do whatever they want, but when they suggested to change the end of my favorite story about papers, I was against that.
— Life is shit, — concluded the toilet paper, — that was the original version.
— Life is terrible, — that was a new one, from the editor.
Illustrated by Viacheslav Shilov
Noooooo! Change everything else please but this!) It was the best line I read on several Open mic’s, people laughed so loud… and I can’t imagine any word there but «shit».
The explanation why the editor did that was reasonable: the publisher wants to address CURIOUS THINGS to the wide audience: adults and kids. I noticed that they changed «ass» to «butt» in two places where I (and then my translator) used this «wonderful» language;))) It was ok, but «shit» and «terrible»….
But kids… it is not for kids, I agree.
Ok, at least, don’t make it an adjective! All other papers’ final words were nouns, — I answered to the editor.
The wrapping paper thinks that life is a gift, the other papers are also using nouns as their conclusion: rainbow, events, imagination. «Terrible» is out of context for me, I said and started looking for equivalent «shit» but for kids. And I found it!)))
Now I can’t stop smiling when I think that my «crap» was accepted)))
I’m sure that my short stories collection is not crap:) But life — for the toilet paper — is:))
It was approved and I’m happy.
It is easy for the author to become happy — you just need to find a tolerant editor.
Later on, in the friends’ conversation I made a joke that it wouldn’t be so bad to change a title:
«Curious Things» to «Crap for the kids»)))
:-))))))) It even sounds similar, and both starts with «C»:)
But I think they’re going to keep the old title:)
P.S. Sorry for my grammar. I know sometimes it is crap:) but not shit, right?!))
Especially after my son edited it. Kids… they are everywhere)))